Low Carb No-Bake Oatmeal Fudge Cookies

They say it is better to have loved and lost, but I never got over no-bake oatmeal fudge cookies.
In fact, those delicious little nuggets of gooey goodness may have been the first thing I ever learned how to cook, at the ripe age of 8 (I didn't want to have to depend on my mother when I wanted a high-fat, glycemically lethal snack).

Well, yesterday I got desperate -- desperate for chocolate, desperate for peanut butter, desperate for the days when I didn't experience mental trauma at the thought of putting sugar into my mouth.

So I played a little experiment. And man alive, did it turn out splendiferous.

Now, I'll warn you; these guys are a little higher fat than I usually advocate. I tend to shy away from butter and oil in baking because I prefer to make treats where, you know, I can eat the whole batch. On the bright side, these guys may just teach me the mythical art of portion control I've heard so much about.

So take a throwback to your elementary school days with these little guys: Each cookie has 6 grams of carbs, 3 grams of fiber (3 grams effective carbs), 4 grams of protein and 100 calories.

Low Carb No-Bake Oatmeal Fudge Cookies

1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup peanut butter
1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk
6 tbsp cocoa powder
1/4 tsp xanthan gum
1 1/2 cups erythritol
1/2 tsp stevia extract

Combine all ingredients in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Stir until mixture reaches a boil. Let boil for 1-2 minutes, then turn off heat and add:

1 cup quick oats
1 cup wheat bran
1/2 cup flaxseed meal
1/2 cup whey protein isolate
1 tsp vanilla

Stir until mixture resembles manna from heaven and you can no longer keep mixing for fear of fainting with anticipation. Then drop by spoonfuls on aluminum foil (or wax paper) and let set.*

*I'll be honest -- a good 1/2 cup of the mixture didn't make it to the "setting" part. Thank goodness I have invisalign and the good sense to brush my teeth and put them back in when my willpower lags, or there would be NO part of this recipe left this morning.

Charmed for Shawarm-a (Low-Cal, Low-Carb Chicken Shawarma)

Don't get me wrong; there's great food in California -- especially if you discount the vast number of chains in suburbia Orange County. I love the beach-town comfort Italian, the endless supply of too-good-to-be-true pizza, Little Saigon's five-star pho, and sushi so fresh you wonder if you surfed with it that morning.

But alas, since moving from Utah four years ago, I have yet to find a great Lebanese restaurant. And I can't help but love me some Lebanon. I was in love with Cafe Mazza in Salt Lake City, but rather than make the trek to the eclectically delicious restaurant havens of Hollywood and beyond, I attempted to recreate one of my own favorites: chicken shawarma.

Oh, but how I've missed you, with your garlicky yogurt sauce and juicy, spice-grilled chicken. The nice thing about shawarma is that it's actually quite healthy -- not to mention that with a sauce made almost entirely of Greek yogurt, you've got a low-fat, protein-rich, and utterly simple go-to dinner.

Chicken Shawarma (health-fest style)

1 lb boneless, skinless, chicken tenders

2 tbsp lemon juice

1 tsp curry 

1/2 teaspoon cumin

2 tsp olive oil

3/4 tsp salt

3 garlic cloves, minced

Toss all ingredients in a big bowl and get your hands dirty (but please wash them afterward -- this is raw chicken, people). Cover and let sit in the fridge 1 - 3 hours.

Heat grill (I used a trusty Wolfgang Puck electric grill because RP was lazy and has a love/hate relationship with charcoal) to about 350. Cook chicken until no longer pink (about 3 minutes per side). Be careful not to overcook, unless you love that sensation of sawdust slowly making its way down your esophagus.

Then, whip up this simple (yet divine) sauce:

1 individual portion (6 oz) 2% plain Greek yogurt (I used Fage, because I'm a snob, and didn't have Siggi's, my ultimate fav, on-hand)

1-2 garlic cloves, minced

3 tsp lemon juice

1/4 - 1/2 tsp salt (to taste)

Whisk all ingredients together in a small bowl and don't let anyone know that you double-dipped your spoon when you couldn't help trying it a second time.

Lastly, chop up half a red onion, 2-3 English cucumbers, and 1-2 Roma tomatoes and mix them all together.

If you'll be serving this true Mediterranean style (I have no idea what that is, but I'd like to think it's this), heat some healthy pitas on the grill. I love Joseph's, because they're low in carbs, high in protein, and mucho delicioso (not to mention picturesque).

Then take a pita, smear some garlicky Greek yogurty goodness on it, stuff with grilled chicken, and sprinkle (or shower) with veggies.

Color me happy -- and 1/16th Greek.